My parents’ birthdays were always special days, since, you know, they were responsible for bringing me into this earth. Across the board in our family, birthdays were important days; I don’t think that’s unique or anything, unless you’re a Jehovah’s Witness and don’t believe in celebrating birthdays… I don’t get it, but I don’t need to. Every year around this earth should be celebrated IMO; for that matter, every day above ground is a blessing. So yeah, when your special day comes around, celebrate it… whatever way you’d like.
As kids, we had parties at our house; they were fun. Looking back through all the picture albums, lots of good memories. As we grew older, we would pick a place to go out to dinner; that was fun. Nowadays, it feels like we’re going back to just being at somebody’s house. As we get older, maybe birthdays don’t mean as much? Sure, we don’t need a pile of gifts and everybody singing Happy Birthday per se, but damn right we should celebrate the day, even if we don’t feel like celebrating. This year was the first year I felt like that. It was the first birthday I celebrated without my Mom on this earth; how will I feel the next time?
Today was about my dad; my last parent standing. It was his first birthday without his wife of 54+ years. I know it was a tough day. We tried to do what we could, bringing over some food and little something sweet. We hung out, played some board games, watched some basketball; it was a fun evening. Life goes on you know… and another first was in the books, in a year of them. Not too much longer to go before I can’t say that any more… crazy.
I guess I’ve been thinking more about my Mom lately. Making it through Christmas was tough; after that, I seemed to just drift away… back to whatever the new normal is. As we get closer to the day it happened one year ago, I’m starting to feel it again; I miss her. Going to church makes me feel closer to her; I haven’t been going. I said I was going to go to the cemetery once a month; I couldn’t even keep that up for a year. Why? It still hurts, and maybe subconsciously or consciously, who knows, I’m trying to avoid that pain. I keep busy; I have plenty to help me do that. Like I said, life goes on…
But today it was time to celebrate my dad, who thankfully, is still around. We joked about him being here another 10 years; recently, he told me he wants to be around a lot longer than that… good; I was happy to hear that. Of course, we don’t have total control over that, but the fact that he wants to be here for another 10+10… yeah, pretty cool. Happy Birthday Dad; happy to celebrate another one with you… hope you’re right, and we have many more.
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