November 16, 2020: Kill Them All

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You ever get to that moment where you just don’t care any more? Trying to be positive all the time gets old. I’m at a point right now, like in Half Baked… FU, FU, FU, you’re cool, and FU. That’s where I’m at with this Bears offense and everybody that plays a part in it. You can’t even muster up one TD against a shitty ass defense on national TV?

I guess the “you’re cool” guy is Cordarelle Patterson. Yes, I get sick of the toss right, toss left, and think the Wildcat is dumb as hell, but the dude shows heart… he runs hard. He was responsible for our only TD of the game. He avoids the wrath tonight. Let’s just start at the top, and for tonight’s exercise, Ryan Pace. Here comes this young guy who made a name for himself in New Orleans. He hasn’t been all bad, but this is the offense that you put on the field for us…. THIS?!?! It all goes back to the QB, and the swing and miss there, which we’ll get to in a minute, but this offensive line continues to suck. The TE we drafted is nowhere in sight. The WRs disappear for chunks at a time. The RBs… Nall, really? Lamar Miller? How many times will we fake the handoff to him and throw it to him in the flat? The other dude who ran out of bounds on his one positive carry of the night; I’m not even going to look up his name. You get a chance, you get an opening, and you run out of bounds untouched??? Sweetness would be rolling over in his grave.

Next on the totem pole is Nagy. Again, here comes this guy who is some kind of offensive guru… what’s the opposite of guru? Shithead? Because after 2018, after the rest of the NFL got wise to him, he hasn’t been shit. Sure, he finally turns over the play calling in the middle of the week, days before the game. Great.. how’d that turn out? Step up to the plate Bill Lazor, who has obviously never seen those Head and Shoulders commercials, because his first impression blows. And yes, next up is the QB…

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You know the state of mind I’m in when I actually got a chuckle seeing Foles planted and carted off the field. It’s like a cathartic laugh… To listen to ESPN talk about how much he’s loved… by who exactly? He sucks. He’s a statue. He is as inaccurate as the next guy. He is the perfect Bears QB. I find myself wondering if we can get any money back from Foles if he’s done for the year, because Pace just pissed away another 20M on the one position he has royally screwed up since he got here. Glennon? Another joke. But yes, it’s Trubisky that should eventually sink him, yet at this very moment, I’d actually love to see him back in there; we may get our wish. For any QB to make me want Mitch back… that guy has to suck; hello Nick Foles.

And although the defense kicks ass, I’d like a word Eddie Jackson. Are you interested in tackling? Talk about a guy who sucks at tackling, but more than that, who really doesn’t seem to be interested in it. I love you guy, but show some fricking effort out there trying to bring down a guy and get away from the “O’LE” style you’re using now. And one more… our new punt returner; bye Felicia. Cut his ass ASAP. All you have to do is catch the ball, and you can’t. No need for somebody like that on this team. Miller actually looked halfway decent back there. And you know what? I’m not blaming Miller for the early INT, where Foles threw it high and behind him, and I’m not blaming Miller for that late one of his fingertips; another Foles miss. While we’re at it, how about the miss to a wide open Mooney in the end zone? I’m sure if you roll the tape, there would be plenty more of open guys he missed…. remind you of anybody? He looks scared back there. He looked like he has a couple bullet proof vests on under his uni; anybody else notice that? Maybe that’s why he can’t move around, like when a little kid is sent out into the winter weather so bundled up they can’t move… I give up.

I’m sure I’ll feel better in the morning, but right now… kill them all. Looking at the remaining schedule, you would think we’d still have a shot… then I remember how hard it is to win just one game for this team. I think maybe my brother in law was right; the Bears will finish 5-11. At this point, I believe that is a possibility. If that’s the case, then we definitely need to dump Pace so he can’t choose another QB in the draft for us… just shoot me…

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