As the Olympics roll on, I sit back on my couch, thinking about all the Olympic sports I can play; it’s not a long list. I love all those people watching on TV saying how they could play whatever professional sport they’re watching; no fricking way. Even the guys watching women play sports thinking they can compete… uh, don’t think so. Yet, I can’t help myself watching these games, thinking… hey, I think I can do that.
I think I can play handball… not all the guys on the floor, but the goalie. I was watching some of those guys and saw a little belly on them… I thought, hey, I CAN do this. My belly may be a bit bigger than those guys, but at least I didn’t have to be in optimal shape. Sure, to play this position I probably would still have to drop a few, but at least I wouldn’t have to run back and forth; I could pretty much just stay put. Then of course is the difficult part: stopping the ball guys are winging at me. I can’t recall playing goalie in any sport my whole life, so that may be a bit of a problem, but… with a little practice… maybe not a goalie on an all-world team, but MAYBE on the last team to qualify for the games??? A guy can dream…
Then there are all those sports that I’ve played in the past that I see being played on the world stage. How about table tennis? Yes, we called it ping pong, but, no, there’s no way I would last one point. Speaking about ping pong… where’s the Olympic sport of foosball?!?! I’d toss my hat in the ring on that one. And then pool, or bumper pool? I’m thinking about all the games we could play within the Boys Club game room; aren’t those games of skill? Maybe you don’t have to be an athlete to do those? Not sure what the criteria are, but if table tennis is in, then why not? Badminton? Yes, I played plenty of games of badminton in the backyard growing up, but just like ping pong, there’s no possible way I would last playing this sport on the big stage. This sport is actually one of my favorites to watch in the Olympics; I love the long lasting, back and forth points. Speaking about sports with rackets, what about racquetball?!?! I’ve played that many years with my dad and brother; that was a great workout. I played with my wife too back in the day; I think we played one time… This should definitely be an Olympic sport; you definitely have to be an athlete to whack and chase that ball around the court. Yet, like the other two I just mentioned, my chances of success would be slim to none; maybe I could scratch out a point or two?
In conclusion, there aren’t a whole lot of Olympic sports I think I could play. On the contrary, there are a whole lot of them that I would have no chance at doing. Let’s have some fun.
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